The last and best superpower in the universe is getting a man to do anything for you.
What is the secret to having an amazing relationship, incredible sex life and be treated like the ducking queen you are…
No it’s not sex as a bargaining tool or manipulation techniques or Jedi mind tricks (although I have coined a few to use on the simpler sex)
The secret is…
How men treat you, is how you let them
That’s it, simple!
Seriously, think back to how many times you’ve over embellished to make yourself look good, over complicated your flirting, changed plans to accommodate someone else or just done something (anything) to please someone & not feel awkward.
There’s been so many times I’ve not spoken up when I’ve not agreed on an important point. Let certain behaviours slide, not set boundaries or not laid out my standards to men.
… And yes I’ve even slept with someone because I felt like a prick tease (because he called me one) and thought I should before going home.
I’ve not wanted to sound demanding, be a diva, not wanted to offend
5 Rules To Getting What You Want From A Man
Before you start barking orders at your man there is a science to this and it’s a delicate balance.
It’s like finding the perfect spot between being salty and sweet. Stating your case but being cute and flirty. Saying no but being charming. Establishing your boundaries without pushing him away.
1. Never Do Something You Do Not Want To
Never ever give into a sexual act for any other reason than you want to. Do something you’re not comfortable with and he will judge you for being a doormat. If you want to sleep with him on the first date, that’s fine. You don’t need to withhold sex as a treat but having standards and establishing them is the cat nip here.
If for example he treats you as a booty call and only contacts you to come over to his .. be direct and say ‘as much fun as that sounds & you’re a girl that likes a good time… but he’ll need to take you out first’.
If he asks you back to his and you’re not ready, reassure him by saying that ‘there’s part of you that would love to but you’re not completely comfortable with that, however if he’d like to make plans with you next week you’d love to see him again’.
That way you’re turning him down but giving him hope and establishing your standards which of course is confident and sexy.
2. Hold Your Own & Have An Opinion
Don’t expect him to make every decision and make all plans or suggestions. Imagine if you were having a conversation and all you did was agree with him… not a sexy esque quality. Nobody wants a weak cheeked princess that can’t wipe her own arse!
Have an opinion, offer suggestions and be confident to say what you like and don’t like. I’m not suggesting it’s your way or nothing. Perhaps he suggests a restaurant but you know a much better one, say that sounds great but let me tell you about this really awesome place I know, we should go sometime.
Put simply don’t try to please him with your opinion or like everything he likes. This is also very much about being true to yourself. If it turns out you have very different seated core values at least this will be identified early on. So… speak up!
3. Make Him Chase & Work His Life Around You
Never ever change or bend your plans for him, especially in the early days. Obviously make time for him but if you’ve made plans with your girlfriends for a Saturday night and he asks you out, thank him, jokingly ask if he’d like to join you and the girls but say you’d like to go out another night.
This is displaying a multitude of goddess qualities. It shows you have your own life. It shows you’re not going to let your friends hang for a man you’ve just met and it also shows that you’re again confident in telling him what’s important to you… and that you like him and want to make him part of your fun and busy life.
If he gets a hint that you’d bend or come running for him, you’ve lost superpower. Don’t be a silly little chasing doormat, ever!
4. Give Him The Benefit Of The Doubt & Then The Bin!
While transparency and communication is crucial, always be a little reserved with your judgement of his behaviour. If he does something that you don’t like such as not text you for days, did not offer to pay/forgot his wallet or maybe he had too much to drink when you were out together… there might be a good reason, or he might just be a dick… but hang fire and look for further red flags first.
Trust your gut, if he does further things to raise your concern, broach him and pay close attention to his reaction. See if he’s being genuinely sincere or passive. But most importantly do tell him.
5. The Power Of The Pussy
Always remember you hold all the cards when it comes to sex.. You really really do.
Feel free to Judge him & his performance & don’t feel bad for it. Never forget that the allure of your sexuality and what secrets you keep within your sexual repertoire have the ability to keep him hooked & chasing you forever.
You as a woman really do have the power to break hearts, destroy egos and watch kingdoms crumble. Throughout history women have used this superpower to rule the world with pillow talk style communication and by simply asking for what they want.
Men are fairly non-complex creatures… how they treat you is completely your choice
Have you been shy of asking what you want from a man or let him get away with treating you like a doormat? Comment below and let us know.